The lesson to learn from this tragedy is that you should partner only with advisors that are experienced and caring and that have only your best interest at heart and care about your future and not the size of their fees.

When I draft Estate Planning documents, I always assume that my client could die tomorrow. I also make certain that my clients understand that the provisions in the Estate Planning documents can always be changed in the future. Also, and this is probably an obvious statement to many, but, if you are married the only time your child will have a Guardian appointed is after the second parent dies.

Listed below are points I tell my clients to consider in choosing the proper Guardian.

1. The age of the person? If your guardian is too young perhaps he or she is not at the right place in his or her life to care for a child. Or, if he or she is too elderly perhaps he or she is not physically capable of caring for a child.
2. Does he or she have children already or plan on having children? Maybe he or she already has all the children they can or want to care of or he or she wants to have more children and could not be able to care for others in the future.
3. Is this person married? If so, you need to consider whether you like the spouse as well. After all, your child will be living in the same home as the spouse. If he or she is not married, you need to consider whether you are comfortable with your child being raised by a single parent. There are some difficult obstacles that a single parent faces raised every day.
4. What are the religious beliefs of the person? This is something to think about if it is important for you to have your child raised with the same religious beliefs as you are currently raising them.
5. Is he or she a blood relative or relative by marriage? Be careful if you are considering nominating an “in-law”. You should always consider the possibility of divorce, regardless of how happy they are today.
6. Does your child actually like this person? You may think he or she is the perfect person to raise your child, but if your child does not have or show the same feelings towards that person, you may be causing more harm than good.
7. How drastic will your child’s daily life change? Think about whether your child will have to move (in or out of state) or change schools. This could be a difficult transition without having just lost your parents. Imagine how difficult that would be if it is due to your parents passing away.
8. Does this person have pets? If your child has allergies which may be drastically affected by living in a home with a pet, that home may not be the best place for your child to live. Many people will not give up their pets that easily.
9. What type of job does this person have? Think about whether that person has to travel for work or has a job that is considered dangerous. This may mean that your child may have to go to daycare (not that that is a bad thing) or potentially even be faced with loosing another loved one.
10. Would you live with this person? You cannot expect your child to live with someone if you could not see yourself living with this person!

It is my job as an attorney to give the good, the bad and the ugly. These points are to provide my clients with as many possibilities to consider before making a very important decision. In order to make the best decision for your family based on what your family’s needs, beliefs and traditions are, I supply the things to consider in making that decision.

Referral
If you do not have the benefit of a referral, you can call your local County Bar Association.  They will provide you with a few names and telephone numbers of attorneys in your area.

Internet
The internet is a wonderful resource.  You are able to search numerous attorney websites for attorneys in your area and get a real sense of who they are by viewing their websites.  Often times they will provide legal information so that you can educate yourself.

Local Yellow Pages
Of course, you can still use the good old and trusted Yellow Pages!  Believe it or not, I have received numerous calls from clients who have found my contact information in the local phone book.

Business Associates
Your banker, financial planner, local real estate broker and agent are great people to be in the position to refer an Attorney.  Attorneys often times will visit with local business owners to introduce themselves and tell them about their practice; leaving their business cards behind, of course!

Regardless of how you are put in touch with an attorney, you should keep some things in mind:

How long has the attorney specifically practiced Estate Planning and What percent of his practice is dedicated to Estate Planning

I am in no way implying that an attorney who has practiced longer than another attorney or dedicates a larger percent of his practice to Estate Planning than another attorney is more able to prepare an Estate Plan.  You need an attorney who is up to date on the changes in the laws.  It is more likely that an attorney who dedicates a significant portion of his practice to Estate Planning has kept up with any changes in the laws.

Is the initial consultation free?

Some attorneys will charge a flat fee and others will charge you an hourly fee. It depends entirely on what attorney firm you use and often times it depends on what county they practice in.

What documents exactly will be drafted as part of your Estate Plan?

A properly drafted Estate Plan does not only include a Last Will and Testament, but it should include other Advanced Directives. These include a Power of Attorney, Health Care Power of Attorney and A Desire for a Natural Death (a/k/a Living Will).  Some Estate Plans may warrant a Revocable or Irrevocable Trust.

Speaking and thinking about our own death is not an easy subject for many of us to confront.  Just the thought of leaving my child to grow up without her mother sinks my heart and brings tears to my eyes.  It is almost as difficult to discuss our personal finances, beliefs and feelings with a person we probably have never met before.  You absolutely should feel comfortable with the attorney you chose.  The attorney should be sensitive to the issues that will be discussed and compassionate in his or her handling of your family matters.